National Watermelon Day? That does bring up a hidden talent...
I once one the Graden Elementary 'watermelon-seed spitting contest'. I practiced all week during Adventure club and was proud to slobbery my way past 2nd place to win the trophy! The perfect tongue-air gun design and winded diaphragm; I could launch one across the cafeteria! It's the little things.
Little girls are not supposed to spit (I am using my Dana Carvey quotation fingers here). As a tomboy, I did a lot of things I wasn't 'supposed' to do and I also wanted to be something I wasn't 'supposed' to want to be... a detective. I rode our pet horse, Smokey bareback, my dad was the only dude showing up at Girl Scouts and I often covered myself in bugs to scare the neighbor kids. I was weird but fun!
Teachers would remind me that little girls were not supposed to like sharks and dinosaurs, though I knew everything about the Lemon sharks and the Ankylosaurus. Thanks to my dad, I could change a car's oil and pump gas by the time I was in the third grade and thanks to my big sis, I was a horror-movie expert long before there were age ratings. Despite a lot of things, I learned that you are what you decide to be and that people are going to have a whole lot of stupid opinions along the way. "Despite" became a word I believed in - it was more a verb than a preposition.
I harnessed negativity, in all of it's forms, and tried to use it. Despite my mother being an alcoholic, she was also a brave party animal that taught me to 'take center stage' despite what people will shout. "I'd rather be in the spotlight getting paid to do what I want than screaming criticisms from the shitty rafters as an on-looker," she would shout as she lifted her beer. A toast to her ability to make fun of anything, anyone, including herself if it meant getting everyone's attention. Despite being able to love herself, she wanted the love of others... no matter what that meant.
As I grow into the woman I am, the woman I want to become, I learn to channel all the negativity that I always held onto and I realize that it is what kills us. From the inside out, negativity, no matter how you channel it, kills you. The choice and power one has is still despite - despite what life gives you, you can choose love. Despite what my mother has taught me, what helped me survive some chaotic times, I no longer need negativity in my life to fuel me. I can harness love just as easily and channel it with just as much power. The darkness inside of me is learning to let go of the hate and see the bright light as a safe place - not a condescending, optimistic, fluffy, pretend place.
I can CREATE anything I want DESPITE what I have been given. The power in that is crazy magnificent and the witch inside me is loving the balance my soul is feeling. Healing through anxiety is LETTING GO of the negative thoughts, the dangerous place between your ears, and listening and repeating LOVE.
Affirmations, afformations, happy thoughts to yourself DESPITE what you might think. Do great things DESPITE how hard they may be and keep your mouth shut DESPITE how badly you might want to spew truth. This power, the power to know DESPITE, is empowering.
I'm a happy tomboy inside this woman, spitting watermelon seeds all day long.
Little girls are not supposed to spit (I am using my Dana Carvey quotation fingers here). As a tomboy, I did a lot of things I wasn't 'supposed' to do and I also wanted to be something I wasn't 'supposed' to want to be... a detective. I rode our pet horse, Smokey bareback, my dad was the only dude showing up at Girl Scouts and I often covered myself in bugs to scare the neighbor kids. I was weird but fun!
I harnessed negativity, in all of it's forms, and tried to use it. Despite my mother being an alcoholic, she was also a brave party animal that taught me to 'take center stage' despite what people will shout. "I'd rather be in the spotlight getting paid to do what I want than screaming criticisms from the shitty rafters as an on-looker," she would shout as she lifted her beer. A toast to her ability to make fun of anything, anyone, including herself if it meant getting everyone's attention. Despite being able to love herself, she wanted the love of others... no matter what that meant.
As I grow into the woman I am, the woman I want to become, I learn to channel all the negativity that I always held onto and I realize that it is what kills us. From the inside out, negativity, no matter how you channel it, kills you. The choice and power one has is still despite - despite what life gives you, you can choose love. Despite what my mother has taught me, what helped me survive some chaotic times, I no longer need negativity in my life to fuel me. I can harness love just as easily and channel it with just as much power. The darkness inside of me is learning to let go of the hate and see the bright light as a safe place - not a condescending, optimistic, fluffy, pretend place.
I can CREATE anything I want DESPITE what I have been given. The power in that is crazy magnificent and the witch inside me is loving the balance my soul is feeling. Healing through anxiety is LETTING GO of the negative thoughts, the dangerous place between your ears, and listening and repeating LOVE.
Affirmations, afformations, happy thoughts to yourself DESPITE what you might think. Do great things DESPITE how hard they may be and keep your mouth shut DESPITE how badly you might want to spew truth. This power, the power to know DESPITE, is empowering.
I'm a happy tomboy inside this woman, spitting watermelon seeds all day long.
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