The Barista Series - A Fight with Anxiety

Taking photos is an intimate thing.  Some mother's go decades into a place without lenses or mirrors to avoid their growing and stretching bodies.  Men will bulk up, slim down, fear their hairline reaching back with passing years and if you focus on the beauty for too long, you're shunned.  You have to love yourself enough but not show it, post enough selfies with LIKES but not believe it.  The psychology of today is warped and the image of beauty is so altered and unreal that no one feels a connection to it.  

With this rambling comes my struggle - the photographer who wants to take a candid portrait but not interfere or trespass.  In a world with no privacy I still want to ask permission to capture someone.  A great photo, a true portrait, is indeed a piece of that person that will float around wherever your photo could take them.  An ether of magical internet that could transform their life or the life of someone else... just with one photo.  It's special. With this great responsibility of magic also comes a bit of fear in messing it all up. That is where my anxiety comes in. 

ENTER COFFEE - always coffee. 

I've gotten past my fear of asking strangers if I can take their photo by making it a point to ask my barista as they make my drink each time I fancy myself a fresh coffee. It seems less informal and helps me with the anxiety I have of approaching people about photography - which is strange, because I can approach anyone about anything else. Seriously, I could sell dildos on the street corner - but I cannot ask for someone's soul (Zoolander must have stuck hard).  Anyway, they usually will reluctantly agree. Some ask for my card to get a copy while others brush me off as soon as they can hand off the Spygirl coffee drink.  I find the psychology of how a person's energy changes once you ask their permission quite fascinating, but also annoying.  People change when they know you are watching. 

A little observer Effect - Quantum Parapsychology perhaps... 

Spyhouse Coffee, Broadway NE Mpls

This young one was very shy and her co-workers couldn't believe she agreed. I felt like I had achieved a level of Zelda that was new, and I was drawing in my new piece of uncharted map. The lighting was soft and the Universe provided a color palette that matched her eyes and skin tone.  She was shy, soft, happy and kind and the flowers framing her and the shift in focus seemed to fit.  I love how she agreed without change and remained herself after knowing someone was watching through the lens. 

Dogwood SE Mpls 

This barista was not quite as happy to have her photo taken.  I wondered if she was used to getting hit on or having conflict with her obvious beauty; something she had grown to be frustrated with?  She made the drinks quickly as I looked on and she tried to clank as loudly as possible.  Her hair, the light, the steam as she made coffee was perfect. She was in her moment - 

A series I hope to continue and if you like, feel free to join me on INSTAGRAM for more and even live Coffee Meet ups!